When life is overwhelming - break it down to manageble pieces!

So what do you have control over?
Sometimes it may seem like very little - your environment and the people that surround you are very difficult to have influence over. They all have their own agendas and not always are you really on their radar... sometimes things that are said and done, or not said and done are taken very personally when they dont have to be, they were never meant to be personal attacks but your perception of the situation made them seem so.
Often when you are overtired, overworked and stressed things just seem to escalate or balloon out of all proportion.
So what you can control is your response to your environment and to things that dont go according to your carefully set plans.
You may need to review your expectations?
Maybe you are just not being realistic?
Maybe you are being too serious?
Look closely at your perception of the world around you as it will colour every decision you make.
Things are not always as you percieve them to be - you are only seeing your version of reality which may be no one elses...consider this and then ask others what they are experiencing, get some feedback and break things down into manageble bits.
Work on changing things a small step at a time.
Ultimately the only thing you can change is yourself.

What if its all just in your head?

Am reading a book that hypothesises that we are all genetically predisposed to have a spiritual side to us that requires nuturing for us to feel whole and to stop us from fearing our own inevitable death which in turn would make everything we do somewhat banal and without purpose.
For every question this might answer there are quite a few more that come up in my mind that are not...

Our knowledge, that we are all going to die, actually makes us anxious and stressed and our "God " brain part developed so that we could alleviate this stress.
Mmmm...
So spirituality ( not religion ) is actually something that should be nurtured, as well as meditative states so that we can feel connected to the wholeness of all rather than be fixated on our finite ego self. ( which would send us all batty ). I would aggree with that.
From a logical and intelligent perspective this makes great sense.
This hypothesis is not new and has been studied by many scientists, psychologists, neurologists etc.. who have looked at the brain and what parts "light up" when certain sensations, situations and illnesses and drugs effect parts of it.
Again, there are many things that still are not quite covered in this theory.
Also the book says that we dont actually die straight away when our heart stops  - it takes another 6 minutes for our brain cells to get the oxygen they need ...then we die. Thats why heart massage is so important as it keeps the oxygen moving around the body and gets it to the brain and hopefully someone is there with a defribulator to give us the shock we need.
So we can get technical about "going into the light"sensations and also the feelings of calm and euphoria or meeting God that many people feel before death and explain them as an automatic body response to imminent death.
We can break down every process into a normal function of our body/brain that has developed coping mechanisms over many thousands of years.
Its proven. Its been studied and documented.

We need to be spiritual ( most of us ) just for our own sanity.

But all of this discounts a God that is outside of us. As we have created a need for him so that we can function in this world and to make us more special than any other animal that is on this planet.
mmm..and where does this put stuff like "going into the light", "out of body experiences", "ghosts and spirits"...we all have to make up our own minds about that stuff.I guess I am still working on my own explanations and am out to read as much as I can to give me material to think about.
I do warn you though, just dont pick up any scientific texts....if you werent an atheist beforehand...you might just well consider it afterwards.

Bloody Satan worshippers my arse!

I am sick of hearing this old chestnut!
Paganism = satan worshippers, human sacrifice and communion with the demons...
For goodness sake!
This lovely explanation of what pagans do came up today in a program that I watched on early morning tv by an evangelist preacher from Texas who added that no Christian should have anything to do with Halloween celebrations ( his primary message ) nor Easter bunnys and chocolate eggs, nor Mistletoe at Christmas time as they were all pagan.
Then he added fuel to his own pyre by reading extracts from texts that showed how the Roman Catholic Church used all of the pagan relious feasts and converted them to Christian ones becaus they had trouble converting those "stupid devil worshipping heathens" to the ways of the new God.
Kind of a dictatorship, no?
Kind of Hitleresque, no?
Change or be destroyed???
Tyrannical, no?
So good Christains should not be enjoying Halloween as it is a celebration of the dead ( but the Christians have all soul's day and all saints day - which celebrate......the dead????)
Oh, but that is different, as was explained by the good padre - cause the pagans are celebrating the sinners at Halloween ( or those that did not get baptised I presume therefore automatically go into the sinner's basket ) as opposed to the chosen one's who are celebrated at THEIR feast days of all soul's day and all saint's day.
Ah ha!!!!
Now I see...sinners and the saved.
You are either one or the other...there is no in between.
Mixed in with this was the lovely world of "WITCH" as many times as the padre could possibly fit it in.
He really lovews to use that word.
Let me say it again - WITCH.
And then of course we have the sourcerer, divination, those that dabble in the black arts of tarot, mediumship and such and lets round it off by slagging Harry Potter and that stupid woman ( his words, not mine )who made it all up and who in all actuality revitalised the dying art of READING A BOOK!!!!!!!! Lets give her a good serving as well!
So pagans seem to be just as much the scum on the surface of the Earth as homosexuals, lesbians, any other religion...and dont get me started on women in general - those servants of the dark one who have tempted all men to sin since that unfortunate episode in the Garden of Eden.

So how so we heal and move on when these are the underlying thoughts of many who hold the banner of faith and the one true God?
Can we?


As much as pagans and wiccans say that they cherish the sacredness of Mother ( yes MOTHER ) Earth, that they hold their bodies as divine, and that the God and Goddess are omnipresent we are going to be at loggerheads with those that see God as omnipotent and the devil as having rule and dominion over those that do not see the light of the one God.

But as always, to me, each person has a right to make up their own mind in this regard as long as they do by finding out the facts.
Before you have something to say about another person's beliefs you need to FIND OUT THE TRUTH ABOUT THEM.
I do not believe that you can paint everybody with the same brush. There are good Christians with a wonderful heart as there are good pagans and muslims and protestants and Scientologists and Hindus and ....well you know what I mean.
So take your silly ideas Mr.Pastor from Texas and go for it...you have a right to your views.Just dont try and shove them down everybody else's throat.
May your God be good to you - he is not my God.
I dont want one that is ready to smote me down because I can make up my own mind.
I will continue to believe in an omnipresent divine force that is so much more intelligent than all of this hogwash that may have been really great about 30,000 years ago when our brains were the size of a pea and it took us a couple of hundred years to work out where the sharp end of the spear was....but now?
Are you for real?

Let me out!

Worst thing about being on a train trip is that if you get stuck with morons in your carriage you have to put up with it for the rest of the journey.
Why is it that some people think its really cool to have meaningless LOUD and obnoxious conversations on their mobiles for over half an hour while everyone else is made to listen.
Why is every second word in young men's vocabulary "fuck"?????
Why do they have to be so disrespectful and have such a bad attitude.
Why does the train driver decide to play Abba and Tammy Winnette over the loud speakers ???
Why do I feel like getting off at Gosford when I need to go to Cardiff?
Maybe I am just slightly intolerant..or maybe THEY are just all annoying.....

and I compare this to the subway trips we had in Japan earlier this year where people stood up for the elderly, women had their own carriages at certain hours of the day, you were not ALLOWED to answer your mobile while on the subway as it is seen as rude and disturbing the peace and even though at times the subways were packed, the trains were so clean you could eat off the floor....you could hear your own heart beat it was that quiet.... you have to see it to believe it!!

If you really think you have problems...

Sometimes hearing other people's stories of tragedy and sadness really puts things into perspective for me. And as bad as it might sound these lovely people always come through the door when I most need to refocus on where I think I am going andwhat I think is happening to me.
I have heard some very sad stories this week - some absolutely heart wrenching experiences that ordinary people have been put through.
Each one has asked the same question, "Why me? "
Losing loved ones, dealing with breakups and children with disabilities, watching as your ordinary, normal life crumbles and changes shape....
It always humbles me that people somehow get to the other side - like one lady said to me today..."You never know what you can really do until you are forced to do it"...
So sometimes our whinges are just bullshit. We consume ourselves with piddly little issues that we just should not be exerting any energy on at all - we should just deal with it and let it go, cause bigger more enormous things can happen at any moment...and shake your world completely.
I wish you all peace and that your world remains turning in the right direction.

Another birthday comes and goes..

So I am another year older..strange but I dont seem to feel it inside..only when I look in the mirror am I reminded that I am truly seeing the changes.You cannot escape getting older.
I also feel quite lonely, in a way, as this is the first birthday where both my parents are no longer around.
Dad has been gone for a few years now, and mum, even though she is still on this side of the veil, cannot remember anyone and she does not recognise me - so in a way she is disappearing a bit at a time and I am no longer her shild.
Friends come and go and family is very busy doing their own thing - big girl is in Melbourne and little girl is in her own world ( as they are at 16 ). Long suffering husband has been not well for many months and its still a struggle for him to have a good day at the moment so I am a bit melancholy about another year passing and time slipping away.
Maybe watching "Eat, Love, Pray" and the romantic notion of life being eternally exciting made me fancifully think that it might be nice to indulge in some escapism - a valuable component is missing though. Cash!
Kind of puts a spanner in the works...
So instead I need to be grateful that I do have a bunch of sweet people I can call friends, who do come and go and thats ok.
I have had parents who tried their best in spite of the most terrible of lives of struggle and hardship and it is time for their next journeys to begin and I need to let them go.
I have two healthy and mostly happy girls who are making decisions about what it is they want to do with their lives and I need to just stand by and be there if they need me.
I have a beautiful husband who can get very exasperated with me a times but who, I know, loves me and puts up with all of my strange ideas.
And I can dissappear, for free, any time I choose - in my head, to wherever I want, if I just learn how to let go......

10/10/10

I love today's date - not only because it carries an energy of change and transmutation ( big word ) but because it means that my birthday is just two days away...he..he..
I have spent today in meditation and in ritual, cleansing, clearing our business centre and bringing in energy which will continue to allow us to grow and achieve our best potential.
Of course I was not alone, as my business partner was there to share in the job.
We reflected upon the last seven months and how far we have come.
We worked through issues that have been fragmenting and needed transmutation ( that word again ) - so working a bit of alchemy.
We also sat and looked at our own part in the whole scheme of things and asked ourselves a question..
"where do I see myself in a year's time - what do I want to achieve".

Every so often a clean out is needed, especially when there might be stagnation, and as our matra is "working with the energies of the earth" it is most appropriate that we used earth, air, fire and water  and the energies that they hold to refresh and renew.

We also put into place our dragon guardian ( thanks again to Jewell ) It is a reminder that we all have dragon energies stirring in us - that part of us that is the primordial brain, that part that acts on instinct and works without us even knowing it is happening like breathing and digesting. So our dragon will work quietly to see what needs to be done and intuitively will let us know without our need for effort.

Mmm..today is the first day of the rest of your life...which is unlimited.
Blessed be!

You dont really know me until you see my dark side!

Mwaaaha ha!!!

If all of our dark sides were as crazy as Dr. Evil's then we could possibly understand just how much of our own character our shadows bring into the light.We would just have to look in the mirror to see what others see!
And to be a bit cringlingly "new agey" for a moment, each of us that stands in the light will have a shadow - it is only when you stay in the darkness that the shadow seems to not be visible to you...
also the stronger the light shines on us the deeper and darker that shadow can become.
But, in most cases, we keep that side of ourselves hidden, undercover, and sometimes that part of us escapes from its prison when we can no longer hold it in.The dark side surfaces as an attitude, a remark, an opinion or more aggressively as an addiction, as fear or as violence.
But, it is only when you see and experience that dark side that you really know a whole human being - you know what they are capable of and you know their boundaries.
It can be tiring trying to balance these aspects all the time especially when our shadow is so trying to gain control and if we do not let off the steam valve from time to time then this side can take over in a big way - in such a way that we feel we cannot control it.
when we are just so continually "good" when all around us seems chaos and madness rules..it can make no sense to continue. Thats when we prop up our real needs by dipping into the dark waters ..
Keep your eye out for the dark side - you have one and so do I.
We can learn about what we really need to be our whole, integrated self by acknowledging what happens when it shows itself.

Mattara over and out!

We had an early morning rise today to get ourselves into gear and set up our marquee at the Foreshore for "Psychic Friday" at the local Mattara Festival.
"Psychic" Friday was supposed to showcase local mediums and psychics and well apart from us there were only two others!!!!
I guess that ended up being a good thing for us because we kind of got inundated for readings, which is really all people were after - we had a lot of stock but really people weren't terribly interested.
It was a long day and setting up and pulling it all down is a bit tiring for this old duck!
I always ask myself "why is it that I still do markets and fairs? "
It always is a great opportunity to make new friends and get yourself out there to the greater community.
The weather held off thank goodness - it would havejust been tragic if the rain had come pouring down.

Also, our resident psychic medium, John Overholt, who has been working from Sacred Elements since our opening, is now moving on with new and exciting ventures planned in coming months and so today he conducted his last readings from our office.
John has been signed with a large promotional company in Sydney and we anticipate his career to go gangbusters over the next twelve months. I am sure we will all be hearing big things from him in the future.
We wish him all the best and suggest that you look out for further news on his website about upcomming events.

Dont take it personally....but!

Don Miguel Ruiz, says in his book The Four Agreements: “Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering,”
Sometimes this advice is much easier to follow than at other times - especially when we feel that trust is involved.
We may feel that we have trusted others with our secrets or feelings or love and they have disrespected that gift.
But I would have to aggree that the only one that fully understands your reality is you and to think that others will see things your way 100% of the time is really an unrealistic assumption.
It is hard not to be yourself and each person's emotional investment in any given moment and situation is different so what may hurt you totally may mean absolutely nothing to someone else - we should not be shocked by this because it is what it is and often to understand it as "nothing personal " will save you a lot of grief.

Note to self:dont make any big plans when daylight savings starts!

Today I attempted ( sadly ) to start a new course at Sacred Elements but I forgot to factor in school holidays and the commencement of daylight savings.
Result?
No one could come!
Silly me - just because I thought it was a good idea I needed to remember that we were all coping with getting up earlier to lots of kiddies who are bored shitless and are being very demanding.
Understood.
So I will reschedule to next month..much better idea.
Lots of people coming in seeing what we have on offer which is just brilliant!
I have a big week ahead culminating with our local Mattara "psychic day" at the Foreshore.
Lets pray that it does not rain or I will not be a happy girl!
If you are in the area - come by and say hello!

Dreaming of the French - Epic

Last night I had the most vivid dream that I was stuck in the Napoleonic Wars with French soldiers heading down to my village to burn it down - husband had gone off to fight and I was left to look after the home and the fields. As the soldiers started their raid ( with sabres flashing ) I froze - tried to find a place to hide but I had no furniture left in the house as it had all been sold to buy food - no where to hide - so I just stood in the main room waiting for the inevitable.
I could hear the screams from adjoining houses as people were being rounded up and then a young soldier entered in full uniform with a very ill fitting hat - then I noticed why it was not fitting him properly it was becasue he was only about 16 years old. He looked as scared as I was so I just ran out the back door.
There were more soldiers waiting and they grabbed me and led me to the middle of my own field. There I stood with a crowd gathering being yelled at to move. But I was frozen with fear and said that I was too afraid to go.My neighbours had their eyes lowered and would not look at me as I stood sobbing, but the soldiers were seeing this as a total waste of time and were getting very annoyed.
Then a soldier yelled that I either move or I would be killed there, where I stood, and that they would make the young 16 year old do it.
Then I woke up...
Epic.

Go the Druids!

Well, all sniggering and giggling aside ( from the non believers ) the Druids have won a great victory in England by becoming a recognised religion!
And so they should, as their history is richly interwoven within the very fibre that is England.
I am very happy for them and hope that they do justice to their ancestors ( who I know will be joyously celebrating this victory in every sacred grove across the country ).

I can imagine how difficult it is going to
Now on a more personal note,I really do not look forward to the time changeover - it takes me forever to get used to daylight savings - but I wll have even more time to get used to it this year as we will now be having about six months of it!
I know I speak for many mothers of teenagers all over Australia when I say that I know how much harder it will be to now try and get these kids out of bed a whole hour earlier than before - it is usually a momentous struggle for me at the best of times but now my attempts will be met with more anger and foul attitude than normal.I understand the whole body clock issues, the need for them to sleep more as thier body grows..blah...blah..but really, I have no recollection of anyone waking me up for school when I was 16.
I thinks its a conspiracy..

Another day, another tattoo...

Just about halfway through...I lay there thinking...mmmmm...maybe not????
But it was way too late....the tattoo artist was somewhere between "e"  and "n " and it was not a good time to ask him to stop.
Truth is I had been planning another tattoo for over a year and then when I started the business I knew it was going to be inevitable but these things have to happen when the "stars align".
Today on 01.10.10 it seemed like a good idea.

If you think those numbers are pretty spiffy - wait a few more days and then we get 10.10.10 - something fiercely transcendental is supposed to happen then or so I have read.
Gee...cant wait! Thats a few days before my birthday so it better be memorable.